Teaching note:

The lists attached (see the Show references and info panel)) to this tiddler are a useful resource for teaching clients about the nature of mentalizing:

"HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU (OR YOUR PARTNER) ARE MENTALIZING SUCCESSFULLY?"

Spotting Successful Mentalizing

Successful mentalizing can be recognized: Features of Successful Mentalizing

Spotting it in individuals

Spotting it in their interactions with others

Re. the image below: In fact, having taught for some time that mentalizing is almost exclusively human, it becomes clear that whilst some animals (e.g. higher primates) show only rudimentary mentalizing, dogs (that have to an extent co-evolved with humans) do show relatively advanced mentalizing skills (see this reference kindly supplied by Liz Cracknell!)





Accepting the opacity of other peoples' minds:

Gently self-deprecating humour:

Here's a quote from Malala Yousafzai, the youngest ever Nobel Peace Prize winner that illustrates the flavour:



Here we are speaking of humour that wryly acknowledges what Shakespeare referred to as the "Comedy of Errors" - the inevitability of our human flaws and failures; to make sense of each other, to behave as others might always expect us to, to live up to expectations...

Spotting unsuccessful mentalizing...

Conversely, there are also Features of UNsuccessful Mentalizing